simply thankful

my mantra last year, 2012, was supposed to be simplify... i heard that snicker.
i had good intentions.  really.  in motherhood, though, i think we can all agree that things get complicated.  it's a title that makes us feel as if we're running in circles, all the while hoping we are going somewhere rewarding.  which, i'm sure, we are.

let's be completely honest for a moment.  maybe you've pinned 379 projects on your pinterest board during insomnia spells, but by a realistic day's end, you're thinking that the fact that you've kept the children alive, schooled, relatively fed, and somewhat clean is quite the accomplishment, right? 

i'm right there with ya.

so, where have i been these past months?  {has it really been that long?  geesh.}  well... i've been fully engrossed in the lives of a busy hubby and 2 purdy girlies.   come day's end, my body literally hurts and the idea of putting 2 sentences together gives me a headache.  not to mention the fact that my kids are getting older and sometimes i think they might not want me talking about them on such a public forum forever, you know.

however... guess who's missed the ol' bloggy?  yep.  the girls.  {hi, girls!  mama is trying to make a come-back.  just don't pay attention to the improper grammar, mkay?}

sometimes, one needs to be reminded as to why one started a blog in the first place... without getting lured into the temptation to compare one's life with others online.  or feel obligated to market the blog for money making.  *sigh* 

i mean, honestly, how many truly genuine blogs reveal the good, the bad, and the ugly?

{this pic cracked. me. up.  obviously, hubs, nor i, held the remote for this pic.  hmmm...}

i asked my hubs how one would catch up on everything since one's last post??  he said, "you wouldn't.  just start from where you are now."  such a wise man.  nevertheless, he married a picture hoarder.  so, i might just try to go back and highlight a few memories.

however, today, i will simply post a thankful heart.

life gets messy.  crumbs gather under the table, endless mounds of laundry stockpile, uncomfortable conversations sometimes need to be had, the kitchen table gets flooded with junk mail, feathers get ruffled, life disappoints.

but, through it all, we have each other. 
that alone brings us joy. 
and even makes this mama thankful for the crumbs underneath the table.

someone i love put them there. 

so, we give these little people neck-pie.
because we love them much more than the crumbs.
then ask them to help clean up the mess. ;)

truth is, i kinda dig these people.

truth is, i started this post a month ago. 

truth is, i'm still striving for simple.
maybe the answer to simplifying is to simply find the joys in all of life's busy during the busy.

truth is, i've had many distractions this evening and now i'm too deliriously tired to proofread.  i apologize for any misspeltings.

August 2012 ~ week 32 {Willy Wonk-y edition}

one would think that by the sheer number of miles we put on our mom-taxi that this mama actually enjoys the hustle and bustle.  truth is, this mama likes down-time.  quiet.  home.  time to think.  and reflect.

"introverts unite.  individually."  hahahaha... love that quote.

i know that we could slow down a tad, but truth is... how do we choose to eliminate something which enriches the lives of our littles?  that must be the key... if it's not building little lives, it doesn't make the cut.

piano each week?  keep.
theater, even when the schedule calls for multiple practices weekly?  are you kidding me?  the girls would call cps themselves if we tried to cut this. ;)
dance a few days a week?  you should see the look on gracie's face at the mere thought of cutting this.
the occasional field-trip?  okay, so long as it's occasional.



there are several other activities which we could get involved in that i know would enrich us in other ways... but we have to prioritize and choose those we are most passionate about.



co-ops?  not for us.
university art classes?  again, no.



christian scout groups?  this is something we participated in for 2 years, then cut - to make room for other passions.

outsourcing more subjects in various organizations?  no, thank you.

devoting time to too many busy tasks can make one a bit wonky.



wonky.  although fun at times, it's not my cup of tea.  i like hot tea.  i digress...



for the past 5 weeks, our girlies woke each morning, without complaint, for theater practices.   a few times, gracie even tried to wake me earlier than my alarm clock.  ummm, no thank you.  good thing she's so stinkin' cute.  they committed their summer to willy wonka.  {interpret as: by the end of the day, mama is usually left feeling like willy wonka, himself, beat mama with a candy cane.}

them: YAY!!  
me:  yeh.  

truthfully, i'm passionate about it because they are.  i love watching them perform and grow confidence.  it's priceless, really, and gives their father and me swollen heart syndrome.



being a great mom, and giving our girls a great-memory-filled-childhood, is my passion.

it gives me strength to deal with another mom that has truly tested my friendship and patience over the past 2 years.  that, alone, could fill another blog post.  *sigh*  people are just weird sometimes.



any time i'm tempted to feel weary in well-doing, i look at the faces of our girlies.  they truly inspire me.  that... and a picturesque sky, of course, but the girls are a tad more entertaining. ;) 

 

this wonk-y edition is brought to you by hmama, oompa #1, and oompa #3.   

we shall share more of our willy wonka performance pictures soon (we still have 8 more performances to go), but for now... i'm soaking up the quietness of these last 3 days in which we have had complete. quietness. in the house.  nothing on the schedule.  just reading... and a little school organizin' for mama.  you know... as i prepare for another year for living life on the edge of wonk-y.

holla.

{for those who've asked...  i'm not sure when the mom-taxi videos will be up again.  my former video camera died, and i haven't fallen in love with anything else since. *sigh*  my girls miss them, too.}

july ~ week 28/29 {snuggling, symphony, sonlight}

hello, y'all.

things have wavered between busy, discouraging, and oh-so-absolutely-inspirational around here.

the mom-{driving-dad's-car}-taxi-service has been keeping busy between theater, piano... and all those miscellaneous tasks that leave you tired {but then you look around and wonder what was actually done}.

our current piano teacher and her husband team-teach.  she has degrees in vocal, taking the younger piano students, while he has degrees in music that sometimes call upon him to judge throughout the world. nator has been told that she now qualifies taking from her husband, to keep excelling.  it's bitter-sweet, really.

motherhood often has me tiredly whirling about from task to task, but taking in moments... truly taking them in, helps me to reprioritize.  that's a sweet way of saying that it holds my sanity together, yes?

listening to nator play piano, while gracie massaged my hand.  she drifted off for a quick power nap.  my heart swooned.

jazzy only wishes i would keep her away from the vet.  and let her go on more car rides.  me, too, jazzy.  me, too.

mama grabbed a few moments to window shop at hobby lobby, while waiting on mardel book store to open.  hobby lobby has pretty crosses, but not as pretty when they're not on sale.  i was more excited to purchase vocabulary workbooks on sale anyway.  did i just say that? #imahomeschoolmom ;)

thrift stores are fun when you send your girls in one changing room with a stack of clothes you've pre-picked... and let them 'have at it.'  only the strong survive.

a dentist visit...  that may have sent mama in a whirlwind of worry.  how are we going to afford needed braces for these two girlies?  if i think of future vehicles, collage, etc... you might just find me rocking in a corner.

snuggling with my littles... the best.  hahhh... that puts it back into perspective.

juicing... because my littles were a tad under the weather.  the theater kiddos could have not shared their sniffles, you know.  thankfully, juicing works wonders.

anyone else start cutting those plastic soda ring thingies after watching happy feet??

yummy meals were made.  and we survived when we ran out of paper-plates.  i think we spent more on water and electricity, running the on-its-last-leg-dishwasher.  yep.  that's our story. 

i only bring you the most exciting news around here, you know.

we made a rare-treat memory, attending the symphony in the big city.  and more every-day memories, tucking in lovable girlies for the night.  

grass weeds are outta control, y'all.  it's been raining.  grass threw a par-tay.

i know it's hard to see, but on the way home from piano, the girls and i saw the brightest white cloud in the midst of a sea of darkness.  we had to pull over so mama could snap a quick pic.  i'm sure there's a lesson in that.  

thankfully, {deep sigh of relief} some funds came through {white cloud} and we were able to order our sonlight curriculum.  our first box day!  the girls were SO excited that they couldn't wait for mom to get organized to start.  so our first day on the schedule is already done.

mama better get organized soon!  

story of my life.

celebrations

family helped us celebrate our sound of music actresses with a 'surprise' visit to watch their performance.

we celebrated at nator's piano recital - a high score on her music guild results, rewarded with a trophy.

and hugs.

the girls and i took a moment to capture the space shuttle... floating on water. that's cause for celebration, yes?  i mean... how many times in one's life will you see a space shuttle on water? 

we won't mention how texas was jilted with a pretend shuttle... or the crazy traffic this attracted.  nope.  won't mention it at all. 

the girls and i celebrated with a lil' shopping.
great prices on two cute dresses found at marshalls and ross. 

...in order to celebrate their annual daddy-daughter dance in style!

i have to confess.  
they came back with some pretty jazzy mementos. yes?

we celebrated when the city pool opened.  
water-slides are the bomb dot com.

what are you celebrating?

the project 366 weeks 21-24 i'm so far behind i don't even know where to start nutshell instagram edition

that's a mouthful, yes?

thank you to everyone who sent messages regarding our blog-o-sphere absence. these past weeks have been busier than i'd planned.  all of our activities climaxed at the same time... reminding me that my body needs to get back on track in the health department.  and stop aging.  that would be a bonus, yes? 

i'm not sure at which point forgoing blog posts in order to catch my breath between activities happened.

in some ways, it's been a nice break...
but i wouldn't necessarily call this hiatius a break.

mama has been busy, tired, and stressed.
and now possibly in need of a nap... 
maybe even some chocolate. 
or a week on a deserted island with just a few great books.



we've been...
taking head-shots & cast pix for a crazy group of theater kids.  attending birthday parties.  thrift-store shopping.  sky admiring.  shopping for photo props.  receiving music guild results.  painting props.  taking and editing pix.



cooking breakfast with dad.  rounding out our dance classes for the year.  dance recital marathon.  sound of music marathon dress rehearsals.  and performances.  the kind of exhaustion that leaves lil' "maria" falling asleep in a good book.  starbucks dates.  reading more about the homeschool materials i need to order.   



enjoying the fourth of july decor in our back yard.  *ehem*  family visits.  broken ipod glass.  spending gifts of cash on important stuffed animals.  pets and people under foot.  swimming.  library summer reading book club.  children on clearance.



ummmm... did i mention the sound of music?  it kinda took over our lives for a time.  it was a lot of work, but the memories will be carried with us for a lifetime.  priceless, indeed.

i will be following up with more pix to fill in the gaps.  brace yourselves. ;) 

i'm off to get my girlies ready for their annual daddy/daughter date.  big love deposits taking place.  so blessed.   

mama will have 2 hours to herself... in which she plans to do... wait for it... wait for it... 

nothing.  
hahhhh...

{perspective}

i'm staring at the cursor, hoping for something to place words where these feelings lie.

where do i begin?  

i've mentioned a time or twenty that my husband and i served in the institutional church world for several years.  our last journey carried the title of senior pastor.  it's a position that no one can understand... unless you've literally walked in the shoes of that title.  i don't say that with a haughty spirit.  honestly, i've never been one to get caught up in titles.  they don't impress me.  i want to know the person behind the title.

as pastors, the highs were high and the lows were, well... low.  a couple of families who disagreed with the direction my husband was leading personally saw to that.  it was no secret.  most people knew there was something brewing behind the scenes.  said family's dad had even been labeled the 'don' of the church.  as if he were the god-father of god?

our 'resignation' mourned by several in our congregation - celebrated by a handful.  that hurt more than i could have ever imagined.  they were, at one time, like family to us.  even sharing holidays together.  tears came quickly for an entire year.  everything i knew was now unfamiliar.   

i also struggled with anger for an entire year.  that's the ugly part.  i know. i know...  turn the other cheek, do unto others, forgive if you want to be forgiven... i'd heard it all.  yet, this smile-n-nod pastor's wife had reached her breaking point.  through it all, my husband's only response was, "if vengeance needs to be taken, let it be the lord's."  i really wished the lord would have used me to do 'his' work that year.


then something happened.  after we rode a roller-coaster of emotions, our hearts softened.  we no longer felt anger, heart-wrenching hurt, or resentment.  i could drive by the church building without crying.

my identity in christ deepened more than this blinking cursor has vocabulary to explain.

while driving the mom-taxi, i saw him {the don} walk across the street near his business.  and it struck me.  hard.  he was a broken man.  truly, it takes a broken person to be so malevolent of someone.  i still believe that to this day.

this blog neglected to mention that we made it through the doorway of this church building we once pastored back in december, when invited by great friends to watch their christmas performance.  a bit unusual, i know.  but years had passed, and we were there to support our friends.  

surprisingly, there were enormous hugs from one of the few families that hurt us.  they cried tears, without words.  somehow, my heart interpreted them.  their hearts must have taken quite a journey since we saw them last.  we only had one icy stare. ironically, her husband was playing scrooge in the play.  i let it roll off of my back like water along feathers... because she, too, must be broken.

the 'don' and his family were not in attendance for this special service.  i sometimes wonder what his greeting to us would have been.  would his face hold the cheerful grin of victory it expressed when we made our grand exit?  or would he join a few others in a language of tears?  

today, he is mourning a loss.  a loss i would never wish on anyone.  his high-school sweetheart, and wife of many years, passed away last night of a sudden heart attack.  they were gearing up for their oldest granddaughter's bridal shower this weekend and celebrating the youngest graduating high-school this year.  this family is hurting... 

and i'm hurting deeply for them.


sometimes, life throws a curve-ball that puts priorities in perspective.  

perspective.  i've been thinking about that word a lot lately.  

complaining comes easy in this life when we focus on ourselves... but we've much to be thankful for, too.


it would be quite easy for me to focus solely on the fact that a gas station is going up right. behind. our. house.  actually, we are all quite bummed about that.  we were given the impression when we bought our house that the field behind us would remain just that. a field.

but... when i look for it, i can still find a beautiful sunset.  and appreciate a young tree the girls named "thumbelina" when newly planted.  



my mom doesn't have liver or breast cancer, as she thought might be the case.  that roller-coaster alone aged me this year.  especially after losing my step-dad last year. 

speaking of wrinkles... or crinkles... they seem to be picking up speed.  as deep as they run though, the stories they tell run deeper.  i think i'll keep them.  i think i don't have a choice.

my husband works a lot.  he doesn't teach the girls a homeschool subject, nor does he check my tank for gas each week.  but he is a hard worker; a tech-savvy, cool nerd.  he believes in and supports our homeschool by providing the funds for curriculum that i've spent hours researching.  he cooks the family team breakfast on weekends. he's the vacation planner and tour guide.  he's my help-mate.  he's a keeper.  we wouldn't trade him.  even for another homeschool dad who teaches french.  besides, he gives the bestest hugs.

the mom-taxi van.  oh, yes, it is full of broken handles, an air conditioner which only runs on high - causing an embarrassing awful noise, a hood-liner falling on our heads, etc.  however... for the past 3 years, it has carried priceless cargo without the expense of a monthly note.  for that... i am thankful.  

i will try not to complain about a monthly note when purchasing a new mom-taxi... for it, too, will be carrying precious cargo.




housework.  how many times have i wondered aloud to myself when the rest of the team will become more diligent in this category?  but the piles that begin to overwhelm me at times serve to remind me that i have people to care for... and who love me in return.

see the lips i found on the mirror?  there are two more just like it... all side by side.  they are still there.  i have an inkling who left them.  no, not the hubs. *giggle*

these are the things i will one day miss.  my mama heart even wants to preserve the messy moments.  well, maybe not the dust on the mirror... just the lips. ;)

i guess what this blinking cursor is trying to say is that life is sometimes messy...

 

but if i keep my thoughts and eyes up.  
on what really matters.  
it all falls into perspective.


maybe that's why i have an affection for the sky... 
when you're looking up,
everything else fades into the background.

march~week 13/366 {recovery, birthday, and a video)

if you think i'm kidding when i tell you mama needed some recovery time - post girlie bedroom makeovers - you'd be mistaken.  for several days, it felt like my very bones were bruised.  forget gripping anything.  even my burt's bees lip balm was a challenge.  don't laugh.  okay, go ahead... i can't hear you.

week 13 started with us picking up the girls.  a 10+ hour round-trip.  

while soaking up some sofa time upon return {while homeschooling, of course. *ehem*}, i took advantage of the free, full viewing of hungry for change.  a must-see if you are into healthy-nutty stuff.  and maybe even if you're not. ;)



nator has an important piano event coming up soon... these flowers are from her teacher's home.  beautiful, yes?

there's also lots of script rehearsal happening in the car.  mama is all about efficiency, you know.

and my sweet nator.  she turned 12 this week.  when i started this blog, she was just turning 9.  excuse me while i go sob myself in and out of a sentimental, slightly hormonal tizzy. 

on the up side, she made cupcakes all on her own for theater friends.  no help at all from mom and dad.  she was far too proud of herself to take any assistance offered.  something she can check off the bucket list.

we took her to a favorite mexican restaurant - her choice.  before dad had to leave town for the weekend.  wait... i'm sensing more tears.  *sniff*sniff*  i think i'm okay now.

we'd already agreed there would be no ice cream... you know, since she would be sharing ice cream with a friend, bday cake, cupcakes... how much sugar does a 10 and 12 y.o. need?  but daddy is sneaky.  he informed the waiter without us knowing, so all 3 of us gals jumped a foot when they came around the corner, singing happy birthday!  it aged mama a year, too, i'm sure.  and only a few bites were eaten altogether.



this week, there were gifts, pizzas, balloons, and time spent with a special friend. 

there was stress given to mama by a certain 10 y.o. who thinks she's going on 18.   not much recovery time in motherhood, you know.   totally not for wimps.  especially when you're outnumbered and hubs has to go out of town.  just sayin'.  good thing she has her father's dimple.  one of my many weaknesses.

and there was a panera date with the hubster before leaving town. 30 minutes is better than nothing, right?



frozen frames are always flattering, yes?

okay, i'm off to give pets a flea check.  the insanity continues...

march~week 11-12/366 {catching up-instagram edition}

hello.  remember me?  hmama here.  things have been a tad busy here these past two weeks.  if it weren't for instagram, i'd have no bloggy post to speak of.  let's catch up - shall we?



we made a roadtrip to the beach to help the sea turtles.
did i mention it was raining?  that should double our community service time, right? ;)

doll play... on the go.

learning.  the fleur de lis.  when you come from who dat nation, this is a must, you know.  and please don't get me started on the crazy media frenzy surrounding the saints.  i might just go on a tirade.  ugh.

was trying to decide if sonlight curriculum takes american girl debit cards? hmmm... ;)

juicing.  going strong & loving it!
we introduced the girls to it.  it was mostly fruit. i thought they'd need a soft introduction, even though i don't recommend fruit juicing. 

i might recommend starting with something more bitter, like hubs and i did. that way, everything else is uphill. ha!



i'm continuing to pass along my slight ocd germ cleanliness routine to my children - when it comes to public restrooms, that is.  as a mom, i've made 9,862,800,742 trips with my girls.  *shivers*  give or take a few.

and also, important sibling conversations happen in the toilet paper aisle at tarjet.

we have a younger pic of gracie sporting a ball of a baby bump.  should go hunt for that.  her comedic side helps balance out her spicy side. ;)

juicing.  have i mentioned it?  you should hurry over to watch hungry for a change.  (free online till march 31st) great info!



road-trip!  we were off to meet granny and deliver the kiddos.
why, you ask?  so mama could catch up on soaps and eat bon-bons?  excuse me while i laugh uncontrollably.... 

okay.  i'm back.
this trip was about girlie room makeovers.
a nice way of saying that mama needed to go through things without said girlies pleading to keep every piece of fuzz mama threatened to throw in the trash.

let's just say that it was turning into an episode of hoarders.  i wish i were joking.



some of it was not so bad.  finding treasures.  a mask. a priceless journal page. old photos.  a dirty sock bagged with cross-stitching. wait, huh?  born in a barn, i tell you.

meanwhile, the girls were livin' it up at granny's house.  eating some junk-food and getting completely spoiled.  next time, i get to stay at granny's house, while the kiddos re-do something in the house.  sounds good, yes? ;)   oh, and i'll be sure to facetime them every 5 minutes, hoping to catch a glimpse of their hard work. *ehem*



at least they shared pictures of their ice cream.  
sweet, yes? ;)
daddy and i worked our fingers to the bone.  around the clock.  we totally underestimated the time this project would take.

i tormented them with sneak peeks of things that would be going into their rooms. i'd convinced gracie her room might be orange.  i had to have some fun. you know, other than playing in paint.  i'm still trying to rid myself of these calloused man-hands.  trying to uncover what's left of these feminine hands.

our printstagram photo arrived!  woot!   next time, i shall order pix in book form.  recommend any companies?



jazzy was my shopping partner and paint companion.  watching me work made her tired.

the girls have shared a furniture set of mine from when i was a little girl.  i gave it a face-lift.  also painted a toy-chest my step-dad made when gracie was born.  finally putting it to good use. 

hmama totally rocked the paint smeared pants on a few errands.  she was too tired and sore to care what others thought of this.  at least i didn't pair it with red suspenders.  just sayin'.  

and just when we were trying to really down-play santa... guess who the girls met?  *sigh*

up till 3:30 a.m. the night before {without one single date-night to speak of}, we hit the road early to make the 10+ hour round trip to pick up the girls. couldn't remember the last time i'd been this sleepy, tired, sore... plain old exhausted.

back to our regularly scheduled routine.  ready or not.  we are trying to recover.  i think i heard my hands and feet cry.  yes, that sore.  i'll stop whining now.

pix of the room re-dos are coming soon. we all pretty much love them. ;)

feb~week 8/366 {life-docs-homeschool}

this has been a teary week for mama.  tuesday morning brought some potential life-threatening news for a family member... and my heart is heavy.  

with health issues on the rise, it really motivates me to get back on track with my health.  i'd like to juice a bit each day.  have you seen this? fat sick and nearly dead.  it's on netflix, instant play right now.  it's eye opening.  the body is amazing... when treated properly.

the distance between us and the rest of the fam is sometimes challenging.  especially right now... while the girls are in the midst of competition, recitals, theater, etc.  accomplishing school-work, while holding down the home-front most days... i'm overwhelmed. 

sometimes, life is just plain hard, y'all.  searching for the blessings...  that's the key to survival, right?  

well, that and instagram pix. ;)



after a long day, we {yes, hubby was home. yay!} took the girls to kids eat free night at chili's.

there was a day of vet visits for two felines, constantly looking for an exit.  that moment came for beau when his temperature was taken for the first time.  then he hissed at a cat poster on the wall.  tough guy.

just as i do with my kids, i researched and finally diagnosed beau.  my search led me to... feline herpes.  i started treating him with an amino acid.  *ehem*  it's not what you think... it's more like allergy symptoms that can turn into a cold under stress, etc.  turns out, his symptoms were not just allergies all along.  it was confirmed by the vet.  but she still siphoned my bank account for his visit to agree with me.  overall, he's a happy, healthy rambunctious lil' boy!  yay for some good news.

unfortunately, because feline herpes is contagious among cats, bella came down with a bad congestion, possible pneumonia. i get to wrestle her to take an anti-biotic.  no bueno.  her vet bill was more than beau's.  the end.



homeschool fun.
gracie learning about fishy hermaphrodites. 
science. check.

nator, jazzy, and i waiting on gracie in dance lessons.
mom-taxi in full swing.  when i looked back to see what nator was doing - hanging upside down, she said, "what? a girl's gotta entertain herself."  *giggle*

my365 app. helps me organize my iphotos.



math and science.  we know how to party around here.

thanks to a sweet friend for letting me look at her sonlight curriculum in person, i think we are going to go this route next year.  great literature and organization?  actually, i'm kinda excited about it.  i could cry.  see?  teary.  now... which core do i pick??  decisions, decisions.



the pets are jazzed about it, too.  
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
actually... jazzy just wants beau's bed.
small dog trapped in big dog's body.

 
tarjet... the girls snatched their faves.  
gracie = cuties.
nator = dark chocolate.  
gracie also talked mom and dad into purchasing her bedding for her bedroom makeover.  she's had her eyes on this for months.  months, i tell you!  nator's will come soon.

so how are you?  what are your must-haves at tar-jet?  have you studied feline herpes and fishy hermaphrodites?  do you think better hanging upside-down?  do you like grapefruit?  have you tried sonlight curriculum?  don't you wish you had been educated with your dog at your side?  isn't beau the cutest sleeper?  ever?  good thing he's so cute. that is all. for now. ;)