motherhood {in-between}

The Proverbs 31 woman. 

We've been compared to her industriousness and beauty through many sermons on Mother's Day.  Have you read her chapter?  If not, I encourage you to.  It can be found in the book of Proverbs, ummmm... chapter 31.  She was quite the catch, I'm sure.  Apparently, many worked as she did; yet, she outclassed them all.  All?  I wonder if other women were jealous of her.  I wonder if she took the time to care.

I have to admit.  This Proverbs 31 lady was not my favorite person.  Then, it dawned on me.

I've often thought about the line on a tombstone.  (How's that for a transition?)  Not the beginning date, nor the ending, but the line in-between.  Dare I say, the most important part.  The many days and memory-filled moments. 



The Proverbs 31 woman was not born pre-skilled in sewing and cooking.  Her skills, character, and traits were cultivated over time... not one day.  During the in-between time.  

I've sometimes wondered... Did the never-hormonal-always-pleasant-never-a-hair-out-of-place-industrious-Proverbs-31-woman ever take a moment for herself?  At least, that's how I saw her.  I can only imagine the answer would be yes.  If nothing else, for sanity's sake.  If I could have tea with her, I'd like to ask her how she did it without mom-guilt.

Mom-guilt.  I'm convinced it comes as a side order with kids.  Yes, please.  I'll take a cute little bundle of joy, with a side of guilt.  We all suffer with it at one point or another, right?  We take our eyes off of love for one fleeting moment, lose patience, and are consumed with it.  We take time for ourselves... or not, and are consumed.  We miss one of our child's firsts... and are consumed.  No matter what the cause, it's always there, waiting to pounce on the joy in motherhood.

Did I hug them exquisitely, so that they feel my love for them?  Did I listen, without distraction, in conversation long enough?  Have I taught them a lesson in character, or did they only see my faults today?  Did I sound critical, without being constructive?  Did I take enough pictures to hang on to the important memories?  I should feel like playing with them.  I should finish the laundry.  I shouldn't be spending time on the computer right now...  I should start dinner.  I should take time for myself.  I should...

So many things tug at our mama apron.

Truth is, when I take time for myself, it helps me to be more present in the moments that matter most during the in-between.  

I don't have all the answers - especially where motherhood is concerned. I'm learning to be okay with that.  Honestly, there's a bit of freedom in those words... I don't know. 

However, what I do know is that children are pretty resilient. They care what I am doing in the current moment.  To them, that's the line in-between. So, I have come to terms with the lovely Proverbs 31 woman.  She can do some pretty great things, but is she doing the tango with my 10 year old in the kitchen, or singing a pretty killer Do-Re-Me harmony with my 12 year old?  Where is that on her list?  At the end of the day, her list might just look a lil' different than mine.  I mean... I think it's safe to say that I will never be an accomplished seamstress.   

If we are serving those around us, as best we can, without comparing to our neighbor, I suspect we are fulfilling the role of the Proverbs 31 woman with the people God has entrusted us with. 

I predict, one day, my children might rise and call me blessed.  Until then... I'm pretty content when they rise and ask for breakfast.  It's only for a season, right?

Although, the language in which they express it in this season of life is pretty priceless, too.

Now... What do I do for myself?  Hmmm... Yeah, I'm working on that one.  Balance.  It seems the unattainable goal, most days.  I'm still working on saying no to people who take advantage of my kindnesses, and saying yes to things that enrich my life.

Motherhood seems to permeate every fiber of my being; always thinking of ways to improve life for my lil' nest, attempting to savor each moment, while cleaning up and documenting the mess of fun memories just made.  It's more of a balancing ACT.

For a homeschool mom, whose husband works many hours traveling, seizing time just for myself can prove challenging.  For now, in this juncture of life, it's seizing unplanned moments as they come - grabbing a quick brunch with a friend, while the girls have theater, or making myself read something non-homeschool related.  Sometimes, it's simply taking 10 minutes in the car, while waiting on the girls, to dust off a few apps on my iPhone.  Then there's my 'to gym or not to gym' question.  It's a battle, really.  *sigh*

If only motherhood came with a manual, right?  I venture to say that regardless of which path you and your family are on, whether it be homeschool, karate, dance, theater, music lessons, *breath*, church activities, crochet, baseball, volunteer work, etc, etc... We are all simply doing what we can to make the most of the in-between memories.

Conversing with a group of homeschool moms yesterday, we found ourselves giggling at the very thought of 'me' time in our current season of life.  I believe in bringing our worries to God, but there's also something special about girl power.  The freedom to say, "Hey, I understand exactly what you're going through.  Me, too."

I've find myself giggling when I hear sweet friends express that I always seem to be so... put together.  {excuse me whilst I laugh uncontrollably}  I have flaws, y'all. I imagine the Proverbs 31 woman did, too... so I think we're in good company.  Girl power, y'all. ;)

I guess one of the best gifts a mom could give herself would be to stop over-pixelating their mothering.  Seize moments in-between to be present in the doing.  Make memories of fun - for the kids.  And... guilt-free moments just for the mama.  The one wearing that worn, much tugged at, apron.  

It's what will be remembered in the in-between. 

For more posts celebrating motherhood, visit my friend Theresa @ Red Oak Lane.

little hands, big dunes

we've been exploring creation with swimming creatures this year.  i have to confess...  *deep breath*  when the mama homeschool day is feeling the exhaustion  of a dense schedule, science is easy to put on the back-burner.  i'm learning that it's okay.  if need be, we've even gone at least 2 months off of history before *gasp* to explore other things.



i confess my shortcomings to make you feel better about your day.  you know... as a friend would leave her house messy before a visit - to make you feel better about your lil' mess.  ummm... yeah.  i like a lil' notice. ;)

{please don't tell me that you are always on par with schedule and your house would pass a white glove test.  i might just crack under the pressure.  i kid.  maybe.}



where was i going with this?  oh, yes.  sea turtles.  this homeschool field trip was an excuse to take a road-trip to the beach about rebuilding the dunes for sea turtles to lay their eggs.  this area is still rebuilding from a previous storm.  it's come a long way! 

it was quite complex.  dig. pour compost. place plant. cover root.  rocket science.  

the challenge was doing said rocket science in the down. pour. ing. rain.  cats and dogs - on and off.  every time the moms took out their cameras - it began to pour.  so much so, that i began to call my camera the rain-maker.   oh, how we could have used that over the summer in our texas drought.  thankfully, it was not freezing.  so, we sucked it up... for the turtles.



in this stretch of beach, the only thing cleaned is man-made trash.  gotta love a natural setting.  most of the rain cleared.  the children played.  we were already drenched, so a splash in the water did no harm.  matter-o-fact, it was good for the soul.

just before leaving, gracie found a plastic bag in the water and quickly snatched it up to throw away.  "mom, this could hurt a sea turtle!"  yes, gracie, great job.  so proud of my girlies.

thankfully, it is not my nature to leave my littles in the sand dunes.  you know - like mama turtles.  i wrapped my wet fish in towels and made the road-trip back home.  ignoring their pleas to drive all the way home, find swimsuits, and trail back to the sand.  because i'm a good mother {repeat to self}.

we did manage to squeeze in a lil' math, too. ;)

where there's a family team, there's a road trip... and errands

 

i think i remember how to do this here lil' bloggy thingy.

but then again, it's been a while.

before i catch you up on our current events, i must say a huge {texas-sized} thank you.
from the bottom of our hearts.

thank you.
for all the wonderful warm wishes at such a heart-heavy time.

so... what have we been up to?

we made our way down the bayou for pop's funeral.
sometimes, you just put aside your schedule for more important things.
theater camp would have been a blast for the girls, but there will be more next year.
for now, the need was with family.

it's funny how the seemingly important things in our busyness seem less important when much bigger worries come to pass.

hubby had to travel many miles to florida after the funeral services.
{insert tears}

the girls and i traveled many miles to and fro granny and grandma's houses for the rest of the week in louisiana.
we handed out lots of hugs.
shared tears.
and had conversation that still has my head reeling. 

attended a cajun wedding reception.
of which i could create an entire blog post.
but i shall refrain.
let's just say...
nator has determined that alcohol will not be served at her wedding. 
mama had some splainin' to do.
and mama wanted to put some adults in time-out.

then we made our way back to texas.

road trip.
i believe gracie ate an entire plate of grapes before we were 30 minutes out of granny's driveway.  grapes are her weakness.

just in time for nator's first lego camp.
piano lessons.
gracie's fashion camp.
picking up hubs from the airport.
and jasmine from the dog-sitter.

a homeschool swim party with sweet friends.
celebrating august birthdays.
gracie shocked us all when she went down the big slide into the deep end.
{last year, she merely made it half-way up the stairs before returning.}
nator is thrilled to have a slide partner.

the party was meant to welcome in the new school year.
of which i'm not ready for.
as seen by our unorganized school room.
but will be.
soon.
next month is soon, right? ;)

that's what ensues when life happens.
priorities shift,
but we eventually get to all of the important things on the list, right?
just smile, nodding your head in agreement.
it makes me feel better.

and mama ended the week with a bang.
remember the mystery pain that took mama's breath away last year?
it happened to poor mama again, friday night.  this is no walk in the park, people.
mama had to lie on the floor to keep from passing out from the pain.
mama finally had to wake the sleeping papa to help when mama got sick.
not pretty.
but at least mama kept it neat for papa.
mama loves effecient cleanup. ;)

guess mama will have to break down and go back to a doc again soon.
*sigh*
*ugh*
*insert more random complaining*

mama was slow moving {with a heating pad} for nearly 48 hrs.  was well for a day.  then came down with severe body aches.  better the next day.

and that's the end of mama's geriatric story.
wow.  aren't you glad i blogged again? ;)

i'm sure there were many more stories to tell, but that's about all mama's got for today.
mama needs a vacation.
of which she and the girlies will take soon.
sooner than our school room will be organized.
road trip, baby!
*crossing fingers that daddy can meet us out there*

and for any who've missed the added vloggy...
the girlies have missed it more, i believe.
they enjoy watching all of our past videos.



oh sweet memories.
and beautiful blessings.

how are you guys doing?  are you enjoying the pool this summer?  or are you ready for cool temps just as much as we are? 

Celebrating Birthdays

God Bless America

A friend emailed this to me...

Her husband served 1 year in Iraq.

Support our military...

The next birthday we remembered... DK's!

Here's Gracie trying on "the pants in the family" {DK's, not mine. ha!}

before we spent the afternoon at the pool!

Mmmmm... yummy brownie cake with vanilla ice cream!

Happy Birthday, DK! We love you!!!

We're not above bribery

My girlie girls are not aggressive in comparison to the many boys on the soccer team, so I took advice from another soccer mom. I announced $5 for every goal they make! Dad said he would double it!

This had been Gracie's first season, but one ball to the head during practice sent her running to the sidelines and it's been hard to get her back out there ever since. I know, I know... We've had many talks about fulfilling commitments and being responsible. I was not winning this battle. This princess wants her tutu and ballet slippers back. That's her passion.

So, it was up to A-Nator to raise the funds. The last quarter... A-Nator plays goalie. She was so excited. Here she is showing off her shirt as she dashes to the goal.

We are winning 1-0. She kicks the ball (a sure point for the other team) away from the goal! Yay!! She says, "I was so proud of myself."

This is just as good as shooting a goal in our book.

Now, the only dilemma is deciding which she likes better...

The $10 or the trophy? I say, why choose when you have both??

Gracie couldn't wait to display her (first) trophy in the family room for all to see. ;)

Not bitter... not bitter at all

Nope. This is not my picture. I don't know if I'll ever get to photograph Alaska. I hope DK will take some pictures for me. He is headed there for work related stuff, but I'm sure they (as in DK and my brother, the boss) will try to sightsee a bit. How can they not?

One would think I had more pull in tagging along on this said trip considering my blood relation.

I'm not bitter... not one bit.

I tried to think of ways I could fit into DK's luggage,

but I wasn't sure what to do with the other half of me.

Instead, I will just sulk... for a while anyway.

I do have responsibilities...

I mean, adventures of my own, you know.

To list just a few...

Homeschool.

Papers to check and grade.

I've let it pile too high...

I will do my best to not get caught by the house-cleaning monster.

Or at least not get consumed by it!

Grocery shopping must get done.

Lord. Help. Me.

I will try not to seek comfort in Mr. Fridge while DK is away.

I think DK will be taking me on a glorious date when he returns, don't you?